I love vacations. When I was married, my ex and I would always go on one “adult only” vacation and one with the kids every year. In the five years that my primary partner and I have been together, we had never gone on a bonafide “grown-up” vacation…everything we’d done had been with my kids too. Which isn’t a bad thing, they have accepted him as part of their extended family, and I think those kinds of trips cemented their relationships, but to have ten days all to ourselves?? Heaven!
It was also ten days without any Others, which was also not a bad thing. Within the multitudinous interweavings of relationships that make up our lives, each relationship needs time on its own, needs to be nurtured separately, just as we need time alone with ourselves, to nurture our individuality. We each find that alone-time in different ways: I write, read, or run. Ad plays WoW or vegges out when I am out with one of my Others. W has a lot of time on his own. I know that J does-or did-too, though maybe not by choice. How she will find that, and how much she will need, are to be discovered when she moves here.
I’d love to take a vacation, her, me and Ad. Somewhere tropical and lazy, with an ocean and swim-up bars and umbrellas with drinks in them. Hmm. Maybe a plan for next year.
On the other hand, I’d love to go backpacking with Ad in the Grand Canyon again. Or spaing at Hot Springs with just J and I, or J and I and the GirlChild. I like the active and inactive vacations.
Here’s to vacations of all sorts!