Distractions

I’m trying to do math and not doing a very good job of it. I am easily distracted, and most easily when it is math I am being distracted from.  There’s a movie, “I Love You, Man.” And Twitter. And PoJ posts. And email. And thinking about last night, which was fun, but also gave me some stuff to ponder (and lots of aches and pains to poke at.) Thinking about my upcoming week and new toys and surprises for my guys.  Some silly show my daughter was watching about people that make cakes. Even laundry.

Oh, and Scrubs.

My guilty confession: I love that show. I hated it when my daughter first started watching it over here, but, dammit, it’s grown on me. I think it’s because it really does have something of value to say. Today’s was about trying to be something you’re not, trying to force yourself to be someone you aren’t, just to fit in, or to be accepted, to be liked. Which echos/reflects some thoughts I was having about last night too.

I have been getting some problems done, and I think I am actually learning the stuff, but it is slow and laborious. However, I don’t have the luxury of my usual two hours in between work and math tomorrow night, because the one show I have watched deliberately (and actually made plans to watch) in the past 5 years or so, House, has its season premiere tomorrow night. The GirlChild is staying over specifically so that she and I can watch it together, and since it is from 7-9pm, I have to go to the early math class and even leave a little early in order to make it home in time for the start. “Mr. Math Instructor, I’m sorry to do this, but I have to leave early so that I can watch a TV show.”  If he knew how bizarre that statement is for me, he’d probably mark it on his calendar or something. Still, I had to ask the daughter to text me at 4:30 so I don’t forget. TV just doesn’t stay on my radar screen for long.

Spent an incredibly lazy day recuperating from being out til 4:30 last night. I had a great time until I was DONE at 1:30 and yet we still had two more hours. Also, breaking down in thigh-high fishnets, 5-inch spike heels and a PVC dress is not the funnest activity ever. And to top it off, I wasn’t able to get my quiet cuddle time/space to recover after a surprisingly vigorous beating by an old friend. I may have been laughing the whole time, but I still needed aftercare that the venue (a mix of clueless vanillas & kinky folk) just wasn’t conducive to. Had to settle for quick snuggles on W’s and another Top’s lap, which was okay, but not ideal. I was wishing we were in “our” space, either at home or at Flog, where everyone there knew what was what and what we were doing wasn’t a “performance,” and me curling up on a blanket at the foot of W’s chair wouldn’t have been looked at oddly.

I think I like the old space where they had the event better, where at least vanillas had to choose to enter the kinky space. I was a little uncomfortable at this new space, especially when it is a free event and people can just wander in from the street festival. It was kind of bizarre–I didn’t realize how insulated and isolated I have become from people that don’t have a clue about anything it is we do, about poly or BDSM, and I was (surprisingly for me) unable to find the energy or desire to engage in  those conversations from scratch last night. I just didn’t want to begin to explore the depth and breadth of “Why do you let him do that to you?” last night.  As such I feel that I probably missed out on a pretty good opportunity to maybe help someone get a peek into WIITWD, and maybe even score a phone number from a fucking hot chick.  Oh well, life goes on.

As I said, stuff to ponder.  And I have to get to back to math, so that I can watch House tomorrow night.

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